Sober Romance

I think today is Day 383.

The husband and I just returned from a weekend away to celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary. We were “way up north” (unless you live in Ontario in which case we were “a bit down south.”) ☺️

This sort of alone time is hard to come by these days so it was a special treat for us. And along with the specialness naturally came some self-imposed pressure. After all, a 20th anniversary should be amazing and romantic and exciting and…  awesome. Shouldn’t it?

But to go away together and not drink wine? No wine with dinner? No wine in the hot tub? No wine by the fire?


And it was fine. No, it was actually fantastic. I missed the wine the first evening at the start of dinner but not at all after that.

We relaxed, enjoyed each other’s company, and had fun. We still had the “good talks” I had thought required wine. And we had some of the other good stuff too. 😉

You’ll notice we weren’t completely alone (one tiny doggie was invited). And we went dogsledding too, something neither of us had ever done before. Super fun.

If you are worried that sobriety will take the fun out of alone time, don’t be. I think the key is to be patient about it, see how things go, and try not to have too many expectations.

I’m already planning our next getaway.

Happy sober day,


p.s. look what I found in the gift shop! It’s little turtle!









Last year I chose change as my word of the year, to guide and inspire me. I hoped there would be many changes, but thought if giving up wine were the only one, that would be enough.

In truth, giving up alcohol triggers many other changes, wanted or not.  Some are wonderful, some are hard, some to be expected, some a bit of a surprise.

This year I plan to nurture those changes, help them grow, coax them along, see what fruit they might bear.


I intend to nurture…

my new-found exercise routine, my endurance, my strength.

my creativity, my writing, my part in this sober community.

my relationships…

with my husband, my openness, my bravery.

with my son, my patience, my presence.

with my daughter in her budding adulthood, my letting go, my holding on.

my warmth, my love.


my sense of self.

my acceptance.

my joy.


Happy sober new year,






Day 365: soberversary eve


My 365th sober day ends in just a few hours.

It absolutely does not feel like I’ve been doing this for a full year.

Christmas morning without a hangover was a truly lovely experience. I can’t tell you the nasty Christmas hangovers I’ve had (and hid) over the years. It’s great to be done with all that.

And tomorrow we travel home, so my big day will be spent on an airplane, but that’s ok. I’m thrilled to be going home.

A very happy sober day to all of you,



Day 362: almost there…

AC1C4AA7-D152-49CC-A8F8-471DE93319E5.jpegthree days left in this sober year!

Today was up and down and up and down, but ended on the up side.

I wanted to escape so many feelings… anxiety, irritation, frustration, guilt, sadness. Wine would have blurred those edges nicely… but wouldn’t have been worth it. Right? Right.

Happy sober Sunday,