Day 179: more patience

3AE340C9-61EC-4B3A-B04D-DBEA0313BFB9It’s amazing how the brain can flip back and forth between two completely contradictory trains of thought.

Last night upon reentry into the world of “up north” (formerly known as party central), I felt some nostalgia for after-dinner-boat-ride wine, wine on the deck, wine with friends.  And a little sadness about the whole situation.

Then today we had a brief visit from family and their big crew of guests. They were drinking,  talking about drinking, and even had special hats made to commemorate the drinking (seriously). They had been up late enough the night before to see the sun begin to come back around. Yikes. It was fun talking with them (they were at the friendly, not yet obnoxious stage of inebriation) and I didn’t mind any of it at all, but wanted no part of what they were up to either. When they left I was happy to get on with my alcohol free day.

Then, a few hours later, I realized my husband was drinking beer. It turned out was on his fourth of the day (I asked). This place really does bring the drinker out in people. Anyway, he made it look so normal and healthy and no big deal. I suppose because for him that’s exactly how it is. Watching him made me question things for a moment.

And now I’m back to being ok again.

Patience.

Happy Sober Saturday,

jen

 

3 thoughts on “Day 179: more patience

  1. It’s summer. Summer is a trigger. Places we drank before in summer. At least it’s that way for me. I quit last autumn so this is the first summer without drinking of my adult life (except during pregnant summers). It feels really weird sometimes.
    I still don’t want to drink, and when I follow the scenario through (wine and snacks in the back yard after a day of hiking… wine after attending the local music festival… etc.) to it’s inevitable end (too much wine) I know I am so happy with my choice.
    I remember – again – the “long timers” who say that after many repetitions of these activities without wine new neuropathways are created.
    I hope they are right or else these occasional melancholy sighs might be with me every summer forever after. 🙂
    Really, for the most part, I am just so so relieved to be done. To have peace and a clear head instead!
    Happy Saturday.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. I’m almost 3 years and 10 Months sober.
    I hear you on summer and up north.
    For me, it definitely got better, but there are still times of wishful thinking.
    My focus has changed, and I look for active things to do!
    I never regretted getting sober, but I did regret things I said and dud when drinking!
    Hugs!
    xo
    Wendy

    Liked by 2 people

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