Eleven months later.
How are things? Well…
I’m sleeping a thousand times better, but still not a morning person. Probably never was. Maybe never will be.
I feel alert and focused most of the time now, but still suffering mood swings and occasional fits of temper. Probably due to my sensitive nature. Or my age. Or maybe it’s all just a normal part of life.
I never really crave alcohol, but I hate looking at it and knowing I can’t have it. I’d like the entire world to give it up along with me. Hah!
I don’t want to get drunk and stupid or suffer a hangover. But I would like to drink wine with no limits and no repercussions. That line of thought is ridiculous, of course, and is one thing that hasn’t really changed along the way. I can remember waking up hungover and thinking, “But I was feeling fine last night. Why can’t I just drink and enjoy it without this next day misery?” 🙄
I do lots of things now that I didn’t do when I was drinking every night. I drive in the evening, wake up early, make crafts, calm myself without alcohol, go to sleep without alcohol, remember to do things I used to forget, remember the end of every evening, act like a responsible adult in front of my children, help my daughter with difficult homework after dinner, regularly tell my son goodnight, and drive in the morning without feeling sick or worried that I might still have alcohol in my system.
I’m starting to exercise regularly for the first time in years.
I no longer suspect that I’m slowly poisoning myself.
And I’m working on the rest, slowly but surely.
Happy sober Tuesday,